Tag Archives: christmas

Dave Barry’s 2012 Holiday Gift Guide

This year Dave Barry chose five of our items for his 2012 Gift Guide.

He selected the Squirrel Mask, Inflatable Unicorn Horn for Cats, Inflatable Unicorn Horn for Humans, Chicken Mask, and the Emergency Underpants Dispenser.

Here’s what he had to say about the kitty horn:

Do you have cat lovers on your holiday list? If so, here’s a gift that is sure to make them say: “What?” It’s an Inflatable Unicorn Horn for Cats“. And if you know anything about cats, you know how much they, as a species, enjoy being dressed up as mythical figures. To use this horn, you simply blow it up and attach it to your cat’s head with elastic straps. Then it’s time to sit back and enjoy the ensuing hilarity for several lighthearted nanoseconds. And then it’s time to go to the emergency room.

And here’s what he said about the Squirrel and Chicken masks:

Have you ever found yourself in a meeting at work when you wanted to fall asleep, or make faces at other meeting participants, but you can’t because you need to remain employed? If so, you, or some employed person on your holiday gift list, could definitely use one of these masks. These are large rubber masks that cover your entire head. You can see out, sort of, through the eye holes, but nobody can see in. So you (italics) appear (end italics) to be an attentive, interested, meeting-attending squirrel or chicken, no matter what you are actually doing with your face in there.

FACT: Many airline pilots wear these on international flights.

Click here to read the whole article!

Photos by Bob Eighmie/Miami Herald/MCT

Unite your holiday festivities with the Santa Dreidel

The winter holidays are approaching, but they aren’t as well-defined as they used to be. This year don’t stress yourself trying to choose between celebrating Hanukkah or Christmas. Let’s all get together and celebrate Chrismukkah instead! The wooden Santa Dreidel is a cheerful and charmingly misguided way to mark both occasions and make merry with friends and family.

(Click here if you aren’t sure how to play the dreidel game.)

Top Five Completely Useless Christmas Gifts of 2008

We at Archie McPhee are experts at the useless, impractical and stupid. In that vein, we offer our list of the Top Five Completely Useless Christmas Gifts of 2008! They’re currently featured on our homepage, but here are the links to individual products. There are no better gifts to surprise, bewilder and confuse the people on your gift list. Just remember, they’ll forget the socks and sweater, but they’ll remember Squirrel Underpants forever!

Here they are:

1. Squirrel Underpants

2. Inflatable Fruitcake

3. Bacon Floss

4. Santa Dreidel

5. Emergency Yodel Button