There’s a stack of mashed potatoes off the port bow. Hard to starboard!
Since every holiday dinner is a disaster, you might as well use the Titanic Gravy Boat. The gravy pours through a hole in the hull!
The Titanic Gravy Boat brings one of the most famous maritime tragedies of all time to your dinner table. This ceramic representation of the Titanic is 9″ x 4-3/4″ and holds 16 fl. oz. of gravy which can be poured through the hole in the hull.
Also, it can be used to stage a historical reenactment if your relatives start talking politics. As soon as someone starts quoting radio show hosts, you just use mashed potatoes as the iceberg and peas as the life boats.