Sure, you could go the traditional route with your stocking stuffers this year (yawn), or you could spice things up by sprinkling a little bit of the bizarre into your Christmas celebration.
Here are the items we suggest will perk up your presents and save Santa from becoming a bore.
This one is both practical and amazingly different. It has all the protection you need for those snowy winter days, but with the delicious flavor of bacon. Not only that, if you get caught in an avalanche, think about how easy it will be for the dogs to find you when your lips smell crispy strips of bacony goodness.
This one is not for everyone. Some people immediately “get” the Yodelling Pickle and some question why anyone would ever make it, much less buy one. Still, dill plus yodel equals hours of confusing fun for the whole family.
4. Handerpants
No kid wants underpants for Christmas, but imagine how cool they’ll be wearing these underpants for their hands! Plus, it will prevent chaffing under those scratchy wooly mittens that grandma knit them.
3. Frosting Flavored Cupcake Floss
Promote dental health while providing your kids with the delicious flavor of vanilla icing. If you feel it’s too girly, there is also Bacon Floss for the more carnivorously inclined.
Teach your kids about the importance of modesty by getting them a pair of Squirrel Underpants and then setting them loose in the backyard to put them on a squirrel. (Ok, you shouldn’t put them on a squirrel, but it’s still an important lesson, right?)
And finally, our greatest suggestion!
1. Zombie Mints
These are mints for zombies, they taste like the brains zombies crave. Perfect for imagining a world where Santa was bitten by a zombie and is still making his rounds for all the little zombie boys and girls with his sack of brains and eight tiny zombie reindeer. After your kids stop crying, they’ll have to admit that his has been Christmas they will never forget!
