Here’s what you need to know.
1. Zac is awesome.
2. He toured Seattle.
3. The video of his tour was edited to a Jurassic 5 song.
4. He underwent an Archie McPhee chickenification process.
After watching the video, you may return to your normal life exactly 35% happier than you were before you watched it.
Ever since moving into our new location in Wallingford last year, there have been some strange things happening. For obvious reasons, we’re used to strange things happening, but these defied rational explanation. At night, while closing up, we’ve heard an odd screeching sound that sounded like an animal’s cry. The alley behind the store is constantly full of odd bones picked clean of meat. We throw them away, but there are more the next day. Finally, it all came to a head when Steve heard something behind the store and we captured the video below.
After we posted the video, a customer forwarded us this newspaper article.
Could this be the Wallingford Beast?
Kevin stopped in to show his body art. Now that’s dedication!
Martian Popping Thing and Rubber Chicken tattoos.
We couldn’t stop thinking about this mildly disturbing review of our curry, absinthe and corndog mints all weekend. That means you get to watch it today.
It was the late 1990s, the X-Files was on TV and our catalog was still in black and white. It was then that Keenan the Wonderkid wrote a report about us for school. We have no idea what class it was for or what grade he got, but we decided to use quotes from his paper in a catalog. Get my catch?
Now, more than a decade later, Keenan stopped back in the store to tell us what he’s been up to. He’s an artist and all around wonderadult!
Here’s how he looks now:
As he promised in his report:
And he kept his promise!
The cult of the Creepy Horse Mask is spreading! I passed this gentlemen on his scooter yesterday in Seattle.
We are proud to present CreepyHorseMask.com, our attempt to try and record some of the incredible impact the Creepy Horse Mask has had on the world. If you have pictures or video of the creepy horse mask being used in a creepy or artistic way, leave a comment below.
Here’s a quick roundup of all the ways you can keep up with us.
If you are in Seattle, or just want to be in Seattle, you can follow our brand spanking new Archie McPhee Store Blog! It focuses strictly on what’s going on in the store. And it’s a pretty busy spot.
Also, if you are into Twitter, we decided to stop bothering everyone with our Seattle business and give our store their own account. You can follow them here.
Also, if you haven’t been keeping up with Monkey Goggles, you’ve missed some excellent stuff. Including teaching English to mean kids in South Korea, our favorite movie you’ll probably hate, what we’ve learned from the internet, our owner’s memories of Fairfax Avenue in the ’70s and a bunch of awesome facts (lies) about Sherlock Holmes. Seriously, you need to go through the archives and read everything on there.
Check out our April Fools products from this year. These get harder to do as our products get weirder. One of them is already in production.
No joke.
Kate McElwee not only took some snazzy photos of Becky and Deric’s wedding party, she also suggested everyone wear mustaches. While the picture above was our favorite, you can truly sense the romance when the couple themselves are together.
Nothing improves a wedding as much as faux facial hair.
Click here to see the rest of Kate’s awesome photos.
There were no cameras present when the Magna Carta was written. There was no visual documentation of the authorial process behind the Declaration of Independence or the good ol’ US Constitution. So, we knew we had to take a picture of the moment of creation of what may become the most important document known to man: The Unicorn Code.
Here is the text in its entirety:
The Unicorn Code:
1. Unicorns never cheat.
2. Unicorns always lend a helping hand.
3. Unicorns don’t talk to strangers.
4. Unicorns respect the Earth.
5. Unicorns are never late.
6. Unicorns aren’t conceited.
7. Unicorns don’t judge people.
8. Unicorns always give 100%.
9. Unicorns graze on peace and love.
10. Unicorns don’t do drugs.
If you would like to carry around this important moral doctrine with you at all times, you can buy a Unicorn Code Bag.
Perhaps no one can always live up to the code, but shouldn’t we all at least try?
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